Skip to main content

Emotional weight of being a wife

A few days back, I had a fight with my husband. And as always happens, after a couple of counter arguments, I had to stop. The fight was then dominated by my better half and eventually I was in tears. It’s being four years, I am trying to understand him but I failed and the cost was always very painful. During our heated talks, he asked me if I know the meaning of being a wife. Since then this question is hitting me till deep. Am I not a wife (good or bad is next thing)? Am I not somebody with whom he wants to spend his life? Am I having some problem which is hindering me from being a wife (at least)?

As my profession gives handy, I googled this question, “What is being a wife?” And I found most of the answers/blogs/posts about this topic are written by women writers. The first page of my search result was full of advice from female audience and almost all of them suggest that women need to do more. But one thing surprised me that there was no such post in which any male has given suggestion on how to help your marriage. Or, at least I couldn’t get any on my first search page. I also found out those posts were divided into two categories. First, n things good wives go and second, n things good wives don’t do. I went through each of them carefully but none of the articles can answer my queries. What is being a wife? I have no courage to ask this very question to my husband who has originated it. I don’t want him to raise many other questions around this. I am scared of his questing ability!

Many of us are raised with the ideologies that a good wife sacrifices everything for her family. A good wife is patient with her husband's quirk. She never nags, flaunts, or demands. Okay, I may not be fitting on each of these criteria but this doesn’t mean I don’t comply to be a wife. I find this an injustice that my husband is asking me this question with whom I have spent my four precious years of life. When for every success of mine, I have given credit to him. When for every problem, I have taken help from him. And when every of my prayers I have wished to strengthen our relationship. However, I feel this is often assumed that relationship problems are meant to be fixed by women with giving MORE. "Wives are the fixers" pattern is one I still find despite we are part of a so-called new generation. 

Everything has changed and got advanced with time but there are few things which are still hanging in between. Like, the definition of a good wife and a good mother.
With increasing emotional weight of being a wife, I often find it suffocating and slaying when I am expected to behave well for whole 365 days. I go out, meet diverse people, deal with problems, get frustrated with my failures and it is possible I fail to understand situations at home. I may behave inappropriately but this never means I hate being a wife. Or, I hate being in this relationship. I have far more value of this thing in my life and I fall for it. But sometimes I am wrong and I expect correction then. However, I don’t like this questing over my commitment for being A WIFE. I am picking pieces when our relationship gets hurt but I need help at times and who better can help me other than my husband! 
Listen This Post Stop Listening Post

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

A few questions to Halloween party people of India

Ugly pumpkins, ridiculous costumes and over-the-top makeup, trick or treating for kids and scary themed parties for the adults, the story of Halloween runs deeply in the Western culture. And these days I have been observing a flood of Halloween posts in my social media accounts . "10 ideas to celebrate Halloween with your kids..", "10 craft projects for Halloween..", "10 things to do at Halloween night.." There are parties happening for Halloween. Costumes are getting sold. Myriads of contests are posting spooky pictures and asking to share even more ghostly pictures. And amidst all this, I am puzzled, baffled and tickled.

I don't know if this is the notion of globalization or a modest thought to adopt cultures regardless of the geographical borders. Howbeit, I am sure about one thing that I hate the idea of kids celebrating Halloween here in India.

I have a few questions in my mind that I humbly want to ask those Halloween party people:
How you are p…

#MyFriendAlexa - Is Your Blog For Everyone?

A Bit of Introduction 

Two months back, I joined a new company as a software project manager. And with this, I also shifted to a new city. I could not write much during this shifting time, as there were many other things that needed my attention on priority. With a new job, new city and a new house, I faced challenges of finding a new school for my kid, a new market where I can buy staple items and a new setup for my family which was in habit of living a comfortable life in Delhi. #MyFriendAlexa I took as an opportunity to proffer life back to my blog which was the most neglected entity of my world during this movement and adjustment span. My target is to write 8 posts for #MyFriendAlexa campaign in which 4 will make you a bit more compassionate person, and remaining 4 will make you more informed.

The First Post Of #MyFriendAlexa 

Coming back to the title of this post, I know you might be awed to read it. Of course, there is no discrimination who can read the blog and who not. Our blog…

Be Healthy With Infused Water And InstaCuppa #SuperBloggerChallenge2018 #Instacuppa

Two things are in my mind mostly these days: Having a healthy Lifestyle and Staying Happy.
Happiness and good health are very much connected to each other, isn't it? If you are happy your health remains good. And if you are healthy, you keep on increasing your happiness. The easiest trick to stay healthy is to have a good water intake every day. However, as simple as it looks, for most of the people, drinking sufficient water every day is a task. They somehow ignore this very essential need of the human body. Every single cell in our body needs water to function properly. The result of less water intake is eventual dehydration, dull face, fatigue, bloating and weak immune system.

Can drinking water help you stay healthy? Spoiler alert, YES IT CAN!

Now, if you are bored of having the plane, tasteless water, then you must know about INFUSED WATER. Infused water is adding different kinds of fruit, vegetables, and herbs to water and letting it settle for some time. This way, all antiox…