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When I took my 3-year-old to a Wedding

It was very happening last week. We, a family of three, were in our hometown to attend two family wedding bashes. We landed there with heavy suitcases and carry bags as each of us was carrying multiple pairs of shoes and party attires to look perfect during different ceremonies. The whole weekend went well with meeting those family members whom I never met before, at least not face to face. Then I also met with a few of my childhood friends whom my last face to face interaction was some 15 years ago. Yes, 15 years!!

However, for half of the week, I was the craziest mother of the crowd. The reason is obviously my 3-year-old. You see, this was the first time we had been brave enough (crazy enough?) to bring our son with us to a big event like a wedding. Normally he is a kind of person who stays silent among strangers. No matter how flamboyant he remains at home, his shyness covers him when he is out. He usually stays calm and only wishes to get carried. I and my husband had the same expectation from him as he was to meet with a lot of new family members during the week of ceremonies.

First four days of the week went okay. Our son was a bit shy and coy. He was mostly around us or with his favourite Tau ji. Then on the day of Sangeet ceremony, the fifth day, we (three of us) reached the venue all dressed up in party clothes and ready for a glimmery, musical and full of dance celebration. Exceptionally our boy was quiet beyond the understandable limit. He preferred staying in the arms of Mumma - Papa, whereas other kids of his age were enjoying the music and dance. We both, husband-wife, were worried why he was not in the mood for fun. We tried to guess the reason with asking our boy how he was feeling. But all he replied "Ghar Chalo.." (I want to go home). Amidst the dance performances, giggles and rounds of laughter, we husband-wife were continuously changing our turn to carry our super moody boy. Finally, the celebration ended and after reaching home, our son was strangely fine. He was jolly, playing and laughing with other cousins. On the other hand, we, his parents, were scratching our heads, why he behaved weirdly during Sangeet ceremony? He likes loud music and dance. He would have played the same way there. But he didn't!!

Anyway, next day was the grand wedding of my husband's cousin. Since morning, there were back to back rituals happening. I was all busy in giving my contribution there so I got very little chance to be with my son. When evening started getting effulgent, all the family members also started getting ready for the wedding gala. While all the ladies were trying to look as beautiful as they can (including me), my boy was miffed for another reason. All his cousins, who are girls, were also applying little makeup. Today's girls are not sheepish in expressing their willingness for makeup. Lipstick, Kajal, Eye Liner and Blush are minimum they want to have in their party appearance. And when I denied these things to my 3-year-old, he was angry with me. I somehow managed the plot saying that only girls apply the makeup. Howbeit, I felt I was discriminating.

When I took my 3-year-old to a Wedding by Vibhu & Me
 After an hour, I along with my husband,  reached the wedding hall with carrying our son's Four Piece Party Suit in my hand. I managed to dress him up quickly there and then we joined others for the wedding party. And with this started the second round of the patience test for us. My son would not listen. He would not be quiet. He wouldn’t sit still. We were at a strange place with music and lights and people he didn’t know. I seriously considered leaving. But we didn't want to invite any further trouble. I kept explaining to my son that he would get lost but he was in no mood for listening to me. I thought to divert his mind with food so I took him near the stalls where refreshments were arranged. He denied almost everything and demanded Daal Chawal and Chawanprash rather (irony it was!). Our boy tried to break free and run through the party hall. My husband was running after him continuously. I was cursing myself for wearing a heavy Saari as it was also creating a problem in walking. All this chasing, running, scolding and wailing created a mess. My husband and I resorted to taking turns leaving the main party area to walk outside with him. At least this way, others at the banquet wouldn’t have to listen to our constant scolding and his relentless protesting. Later, my husband and I regretted this bold move of taking our boy there. We were first timers actually, so we were over cautious and worried and frustrated at the same time.

In case you’re wondering, this is nothing like our normal outing experiences. My son is pleasant and well-behaved outside about 90 percent of the time. I and my husband are just so horrified by this experience, that we might think twice before going into any more wedding invitations in the near future. I know it is said that "You never would have known unless you tried" but that was a lot to take on for a 3-year-old.

How was your experience when you took your kid to a wedding for the first time?

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