Skip to main content

Mommy tantrum,How you handle it?

My 2-year-old was doing something with his Lego set. 
Suddenly he started scattering them around.
“Vibhu, don’t throw them” I said in a polite tone.
He ignored what I said and continued doing the same thing.
Some of the parts were behind the bed, some inside it and some of them were on the floor.
“Vibhu, ENOUGH, stop playing”. I shrieked in my loudest most threatening voice. I collected them all, put inside the box and placed the box where my son couldn’t reach.
My toddler began to cry and I realized I was completely boiling over when I did this. 
This is always said that Parenting is the most stressful yet rewarding job. But I want to meet the person who first said that because many times our rewards are hard to come by. My son is growing very fast and the level of patience test keeps on getting harder for me. Interestingly my parenting stress doesn’t come from my son at times, but from trying to balance everything. I want to get ready quickly in the morning but my son is in the mood of playing. I want him to sit calm and play with his toys whereas he wants to scatter them without the intention of playing. Like so, I can give many examples where I want to balance my toddler's behavior and my expectations. And these are the moments when I hit an intolerable stress moment. The result is, I yell even I know that I should not, but it happens!
I read somewhere that these are symptoms of Mommy tantrum. When mothers scream, yell and show their frustration in front of kids. But is this a NO NO? It's because we love our kids so much that they are able to provoke such strong feelings of anger in us. Some of us feel guilty that we yelled over kids. Some even feel worse and suffocated because they couldn't release their anger-mix feelings out. But my thinking is little different from those philosophies which assume parents wrong if they yell. I am sorry to differ to those psychologists who say that yelling is usually a sign that a parent has no strategy to deal with tough situations. If we flip out and have a tantrum in front of our kid, I think it's okay. We are human with human emotions and mind. We all deal with situations differently. What matters is how we handle it from that moment on.
To me, it’s a learning moment when I lose it over my son and later I think about it. I go and say sorry to my son, and I have not one bit of shame about it. He is still immature to understand the locus but my plan is I would avoid such situations in future but if it happens I would try to explain it to my son. I know I should take steps to break on my Mama Tantrum. But I am going with a brand new solution for this problem. I don't feel guilty and I don't kill myself because I struggled with furious angry thoughts. I believe in explaining the consequences to doing certain things to my son and I do it to my level best. The reality is, I don’t suddenly feel excited to hang out with him after a stressful moment. And I don’t want to be a “fun mother” who never yells. But those bitter moments I redeem with giving chocolates to my son, or asking him if he wants his Frooty, or if he wants to go outside. Things immediately change and by the time I return with his favourite things, he has already forgotten about my tantrum.
Have you had a Mommy tantrum? How you deal with it?

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

पत्नियों के लिए भी एक व्रत का प्रस्ताव..

अरे याद है ना.. हर साल की तरह वो प्यार का त्यौहार फिर से आ गया.. अच्छा तो आप कंफ्यूज हो गई कि ये वैलेंटाइन डे तो कब का जा चुका अब किस प्यार के त्यौहार कि बात करने लगी मैं.. बताती हूँ बताती हूँ.. अपनी हिन्दू सभ्यता में भी एक प्यार का त्यौहार होता है "करवा चौथ.."अहा, क्या उत्सव है प्रेम का. पहले प्रेम मिश्रित सेवा फिर सेवा के बदले प्रेम मिश्रित उपहार. वाह..

बाजार पट गए है डिज़ाइनर चमकदार छलनी से लेकर गोटे लगी थालियों से और होने भी चाहिए. आखिर इस कदर महान संस्कृति जिसमें पति को देवता मान कर, उनके लिए दिन भर भूखे प्यासे रहकर पत्नियां व्रत करती हैं, उनकी उम्र बढ़ाने जैसा ईश्वरीय कार्य करती हैं, उस दैवीय व्रत का इतना उत्सव तो होना ही चाहिए. और याद रहे चरणस्पर्श करना एकदम जरूरी है व्रत के नियमो के हिसाब से नहीं तो पति की उम्र से छेड़ छाड़ हो सकती है. समझ नहीं आता इतना ज्ञान आया कहा से हमारे पूर्वजो में जिससे ये पता चला कि अगर पत्नी दिन भर भूखे प्यासे रहकर चाँद की पूजा करे तो पति की उम्र साल दर साल बढ़ती जाती है? वैसे धन्य है भारतीय महिलाये. पति चाहे शराबी, जुवारी कबाबी कैसा भी हो, पतियों…

Be Healthy With Infused Water And InstaCuppa #SuperBloggerChallenge2018 #Instacuppa

Two things are in my mind mostly these days: Having a healthy Lifestyle and Staying Happy.
Happiness and good health are very much connected to each other, isn't it? If you are happy your health remains good. And if you are healthy, you keep on increasing your happiness. The easiest trick to stay healthy is to have a good water intake every day. However, as simple as it looks, for most of the people, drinking sufficient water every day is a task. They somehow ignore this very essential need of the human body. Every single cell in our body needs water to function properly. The result of less water intake is eventual dehydration, dull face, fatigue, bloating and weak immune system.

Can drinking water help you stay healthy? Spoiler alert, YES IT CAN!

Now, if you are bored of having the plane, tasteless water, then you must know about INFUSED WATER. Infused water is adding different kinds of fruit, vegetables, and herbs to water and letting it settle for some time. This way, all antiox…

The Young Chronicle - A Personal News App For Kids

Our kids these days are spending a good amount of time checking and using today's smartphone. And the most amusing thing is kids are getting, even more, smarter to understand this whole world of apps, games, selfies and video recording. In no time they understand how such and such app works. In very less time, they skill those gimmicky games and challenge us showing the score. However, this screen time should be controlled for good health of a child. For parents, it is a responsibility to keep an eye on what content kids are watching, what types of games they are playing and what things they are sharing on social media.

 Being a new generation people, we can't live separated from our phones. Neither can we keep our kids completely away from using phones. But what we can do is to facilitate things that can be helpful for kids even if they come in the form of phone apps and games. Educational apps and informative games can provide our kids much-needed insight and knowledge. One…