Ever since I became a mother, every now and then I get trapped into some kind of guilt. At times, I wanted to be a stay at home mother because my work life takes most of my day and I spend less time with my son. Then I thought work from home is the best. One can work and be with kids at the same time. But soon I realized I was wrong. Whenever I took work-from-home, I never was able to complete my office toils and in chasing my goal of that day, I was not able to give my full heart to my son's activities. To come out of my guilt clouds, I read many mother stories who shared their feelings and guilt factors. It's been almost two years I have been listening and reading how mothers are finding ways of feeling guilty. And I now believe whether we are working or stay at home mothers, we find either way of feeling guilty. No matter what we try to do for our family and kids, guilt will sneak it's way in. It has become a syndrome that affects every single mother.
Take a look at different forms of guilt here:
The Working mother :
Thoughts : Today I am going to the best mother! I would work hard and show my kids that it's important to be successful in life. Also that money matters so that we can have what we need to live a comfortable life and a visit for Disney land too. I would reach home timely and get some time for playing with them. I would kiss them at night with a quick story.
Guilt : I am not spending enough time with my kids. I should invest more time in playing with them, teaching them, telling them stories and cooking home-made for them. I am getting late and they much be waiting for me to go to the park. What I am giving to them, only money? I am not the best mother!
The Stay at Home mother :
Thoughts : Today I am going to the best mother! I would spend one-to-one time with each of them. I would give them so much of love, affection, attention and care. I would teach them about the world outside. I would do crafting, painting and spend my day with laughing and running with them.
Guilt : I don't have time to play with them. Toys are scattered everywhere and floor is also messy. Oh paint is all over the bed sheet and they have soiled up their cloths. I should have not let them paint. I can't get them still for a moment to tell them about this world. I am so tired in running behind them and I am feeling guilty of wanting my nap time. I am not the best mother!
The work at home mother:
Thoughts : Today I am going to the best mother! I am going to balance my day with giving time to my kids and completing my work. I'll get some time to prepare lunch for my kids and snuggle them before their after-noon nap. During this time I'll finish up my remaining work and as they get up, I'll take them to park and play with them.
Guilt : I am neglecting them as I am stuck in my office call and not playing with them. The day is passing so fast and I am still sitting on my laptop. When will I cook lunch? I am playing them since long and this way I would not be able to complete my today's office tasks. I am so bad, I am giving my mind to office more than my kids. I am not the best mother!
So mothers, here are the guild factors at their best. You can always try to do right things every day but you know there is always a flip side of coin. Not always things happen as we want them to happen. So you are either doing too much or loo little at some side. Instead of trying to do All the things, plan little and simple things and slay the guilt. Think once in your mind what really matters and kill the guilt. If you can't spend whole day with your kids, spend little but quality time at night with them. If you can't cook for them, order healthy food for them. If you can't take them to park, play with them indoor that involve some kind of physical activity. And most importantly love them the most! Please remember,
Guilt will always be there, celebrate your love everyday!
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