Skip to main content

Anniversary, before and after kids..

The anniversary celebration is one such day every wife looks for. But after my first anniversary, I never had much expectation from my husband. I know how husbands change after marriage! And so I’ve never been the type to demand expensive gifts or elaborate displays of affection. But in a deep corner of my heart, I always wanted my husband to surprise me with his gestures of love on our anniversary and contrary, my husband being a non-romantic never did any such thing. No issues, I learned how to make myself happy when I want to. 

Then the day came when we became parents and my expectations changed a bit more. I accepted the fact that after having kids couples never get much kick to celebrate their anniversary. However, I didn’t anticipate that it would be so difficult to get five seconds for ourselves once we have a baby running around. In my post "How we think before and after becoming a Mother" I tried to depict how a mother's thought process changes after kids. And now have a look how our Anniversaries change after becoming parents:

Planning for celebration
Before : We spend a good amount of time in all planning and preparation. We often plan a weekend away or a romantic dinner at a favorite restaurant followed by drinks. We also plan for movie outing where we sit hand in hand with our spouse.
After : We rarely get a chance to go for dinner as we fear of our kids making disaster there. Many times husbands forget their anniversaries and wives pass the whole day in making them remember what is the date today!  
Movie outing
Before : If we decide to go to a movie with dinner, we go to the best of theaters and see something we both, husband-wife, have been waiting to see forever. Best of theaters means instead of classic and silver, we get tickets for comfortable lounge sitting.
After : There is absolutely no Outing now. We search for online movies that are less long because we can never stay up long enough for a full-length Bollywood movie. Even if we go for a movie, we often regret sitting there blinking at our babies continuously going to washrooms and asking for pop-corns.
Anniversary Shopping
Before : We probably buy a whole new outfit for the occasion with roaming store to store. Ladies spend hours doing your hair and nails. Husbands may not be much excited about shopping but they care what to wear when going out.
After: We use Online shopping option as we can't afford to go for a special shopping with kids. We get everything pre-ordered and sometimes shopping makes no sense. It's only anniversary, it comes every year!
Romance
Before : We try our best to behave romantic that day. And worth mentioning, so many LOVE YOU messages, bouquet,surprise gifts and lots of love expression. This is the day when we feel we are so fortunate to marry our partner.
After : Our idea of ultimate romance has completely changed. We want peace and good sleep. No messages and no flowers, and ladies like me buy their gift herself. And we often think why anniversary comes every year. Why not we married on 29 FEB (leap year) !
Remembering it
Before : We start marking calendar months before. We pre-plan things and may go for vacation. We write “anniversary” in big letters in our TO-DO list and color a little hearts around the day.
After : Many times we totally forget the day until we receive a call from a friend or family member. And God bless Facebook, we get reminders for anniversary also. Instead of feeling guilty that we forget our anniversary, we justify it saying “we have changed, we want every day as simple as it can be”.
Still, we count for our anniversary every year, at least wives do for sure!
Listen This Post Stop Listening Post

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Worshiping Krishna.. वसुदॆव सुतं दॆवं कंस चाणूर मर्दनम्..

Shri Krishna Ashtakam is a worshiping prayer devoted to Lord  Krishna praising his powers and glory. Ashtakam means a prayer which contains eight hymns(slokas). Each hymn or verse is composed of four phrases, each describing one quality or great acts of Sri Krishna. And, each sloka is composed in two lines. It is believed that krishnashtakam lyrics possess great powers. Here is the English translation of this holy verse : वसुदॆव सुतं दॆवं कंस चाणूर मर्दनम् । दॆवकी परमानन्दं कृष्णं वन्दॆ जगद्गुरुम् ॥1॥ Vasudeva Sutam Devam Kansa Chanura Mardanam... Devaki Paramanandam Krishnam Vande Jagadgurum.. I pay my tribute to the teacher of this world Krishna, who is the son of Vasudev, who killed Kansa and Chanura and who is the source of great joy to Devaki. अतसी पुष्प सङ्काशं हार नूपुर शॊभितम् ।रत्न कङ्कण कॆयूरं कृष्णं वन्दॆ जगद्गुरुम् ॥ |2| Atasi Pushpa Sankasham Hara Nupura Shobhitam..Ratna Kankana Keyuram Krishnam Vande Jagadgurum... I salute to the teacher of this world Krishna,

#TheWomanThatIAm #RRxMM I am not the woman who..

I am not the mother who.. I am not the mother who stayed longer with her newborn, I resumed office when he was barely 2 months old. I am not the mother who witnessed each of my kid's milestones, I got to know them when being told. I am not the mother who could tell breastfeeding stories, my child is a formula-fed gold. I am not the mother who keeps the house spotless, I let my son scatter toys and go overbold. I am not the mother who manages a detailed list for parenting chores, I often keep my to-dos on hold. I am not the mother whom people admire, I hear people calling me selfish and cold. ALSO I am a doting mother who tries to juggle between family and work every other minute.  I am a mother who watches silly cartoons with my boy.  I am a mother who repeatedly tells the same story every night.  I am a mother who cooks my son's favorite food every week.  And I am also a mother who is the closest person in my son's life! I am not the wife wh

My 'Invisible' Accomplishments #DecadeHop #RRxMM

As we entered 2020, through this post I am trying to contemplate the coolest, most daring, and most significant feats of my life during the last decade. Now the more I regress my memory, the more I feel there are two types of achievements or accomplishments that I can ponder upon; Visible and Invisible. Visible ones are those that I can count on my finger like a parrot and others can nod also. I got specs on, married to a not-so-romantic man, produced a baby, started writing and added good 17 kgs in my body volume (I was 50 in 2011). However, there are many invisible accomplishments too that either I know silently or very few can assert. From 2011 to 2019, Who am I now From a coy soul to now an outspoken woman, the trek was not easy. I achieved it. From being a no-makeup girl to now a lipstick swatches observer, the transition was tough. But it happened. And from being a sweet hater to now a sweet lover, the change was mysterious yet occurred. And now I can die for Gulab Jamuns.